We are certainly living in some uncertain times and at present, we all have some worries and even fears as to how we might get through this current period of uncertainty.
One definition of resilience is “the ability to bounce back”, but we may need to consider that this current phase may go on for some time yet. Maybe we must do more than just bouncing back, maybe we also need to think about bouncing forward.
As human beings, we are hardwired to perceive threat. In fact, we have 5x more neurons in our brain dedicated to threat than we do any other function. One of our brains primary functions is to keep us safe. Or brains are very effective at maintaining the status quo and attempting to take us away from anything which may result in us being in a threatening situation. As soon as we perceive danger, the amygdala in our brain triggers our fight/flight response and this response is much faster than the pathway to our higher-level thinking. As a result – it is the fear we respond with first and we tend to avoid change, ambiguity and challenges that cause us threat.
The challenge therefore is to change our behaviour.
The good news is, with some dedicated intent, we can reframe change and challenges as opportunities, rather than as threats.
Consider these steps to “bounce forward” and embrace this uncertainty and manage your amygdala hijack.
1) Control your controllables.
There’s an old Chinese proverb that says: “If you have a problem and you can control it, then you don’t have a problem. If you have a problem and you can’t control it, then you also don’t have a problem.”
Think about undertaking a simple exercise. Draw two circles, one within the other. In the outer circle, write down all the things which you have no control over, or you cannot change about the issue. Now in the inner circle, write down all the things that are within your control, or you do have the control to influence. Now consider…. Where are you spending most of your time when worrying and thinking….. in the inner circle or the outer circle? Which would be more productive?
Now that you have recognised the things you can control that are within your inner circle, choose one issue to work on. Break this issue into parts and start problem solving and listing all the various options you have for resolution to this issue.
Go Wild – think of all the options that are within your arsenal to manage this issue. Now consider the best options out of your brainstorming and write a goal for yourself. What is it that you want to achieve?
Remember, a goal is just a dream until you write it down.
2) If You Name It You Can Tame It
Many of us currently understand we are feeling very uneasy, but we often don’t understand or label the exact emotion we are experiencing.
When we take the time to consciously name the emotion we are experiencing, we have so much more insight to consider the trigger that resulted in this emotion and then the actions you could take to manage your emotional response.
Remember, emotions are simply data – what is your emotion telling you about your response?
3) Do you have a “Mindset to Match”
When embracing the challenges that life is currently throwing our way, we need to consider what mindset we are firmly entrenched in. Do we believe in our ability to grow and change, or do we believe we have fixed characteristics and adaptability? Do we have a fixed or a growth mindset?
A growth mindset is “the understanding that abilities and understanding can be developed” Those with a growth mindset believe that they can get grow through putting in time and dedicated effort.
On the flipside, a fixed mindset is one that assumes abilities and understanding are relatively fixed. Those with a fixed mindset may not believe that intelligence can be enhanced, or typically believe that you either “have it or you don’t” when it comes to abilities and talents.
So, consider how you can create a new compelling belief: a belief in yourself, in your own skills and abilities, and in your capacity for positive change. You can start to see failure in a different light: see failure as an opportunity to learn from your experiences and apply what you have learned. Consider getting friendly with challenges: know that if you mean to accomplish anything worthwhile, you will face many challenges on your journey; prepare yourself for facing these challenges, and for failing sometimes, but continue to be tenacious – you just haven’t got there…. Yet!!
Want to know more about bouncing forward? Send me an email at michelle@bakjacconsulting.com to enquire about coaching to build your personal strategies.
Michelle Bakjac is an experienced Psychologist, Organisational Consultant, Coach, Speaker and Facilitator. As Director of Bakjac Consulting, she is a credentialed Coach with the International Coach Federation (ICF) and a member of Mental Toughness Partners and an MTQ48 accredited Mental Toughness practitioner.
Michelle assists individuals and organisations to develop their Mental Toughness to improve performance, leadership, behaviour and wellbeing.
You can find her at www.bakjacconsulting.com or michelle@bakjacconsulting.com
